Tuesday, July 8, 2008


Meet Wall-E, he's a robot. See Wall-E collect trash. See Wall-E befriend a cockroach. See Wall-E squat a log (er in this case cube) of garbage and arrange it like Jenga pieces in a tower. See Wall-E fall in love. No really, just see Wall-E. You have to hand it to Pixar, they somehow managed to pull off a post apocalyptic sci-fi Chaplin-esque romantic comedy adventure movie about the environment and not suck or be preachy about it.

Wall-E is about the last robot on Earth. In fact he's the last anything on Earth. You see, in the future mankind treated Earth like a toilet and like any lazy people who don't pick up after themselves, decided to ditch the planet and lounge it up in space while thousands of little garbage picking bots cleaned up their mess. Flash forward several centuries later and all that's left is Wall-E. He wakes up, he picks up trash, he builds neat little skyscrapers out of them, he finds little trinkets to take him, he watches musicals, then he goes to sleep (mode) and repeat. He's good at what he does, which is why he's the last thing on Earth. The only other things that seem to survive with him are the last cockroach (you know shit's hit the fan when there's only one cockroach left alive) and Twinkies. Makes you wonder why more things can't be made from Twinkies since all forms of media seem to portray them as invulnerable to the ravages of time and environment.

Now meet Eve. Apparently in the future Ipods are not only robots, they carry neat blaster cannons, scanners, and are named Eve. Eve meets Wall-E. Wall-E falls for Eve, Wall-E and Eve act out a time tested love story, but with robots. Eve takes Wall-E to her giant space ship with giant fat humans who became lazier than the Jetsons ever portrayed humans being. All the things you love about sci-fi movies seem to take place. Robots uprise, artificial intelligences deem humans stupider than them, battles are fought, lives in peril, the fate of humanity in jeopardy. And all the while, Wall-E is seducing Eve with his underdog charm and gritty exterior (really, he's one filthy bot, he picks up garbage all day remember?) and not much else since in the future robot's can't say anything beyond their name. Yes, you can count the number of words all the robots in the movie say on one hand. Which means it takes some talented body language for Wall-E to flirt with Eve, that sly devil-bot. In the end, Wall-E is about the environment, and what happens when we ignore Al Gore and the hippies and crap where we eat. But it's nice to know someday my Ipod will have a blaster cannon.

Wall-E gets 4 1/2 Gomorrahs. One for the two robots, one for the ghost of Fred Willard, one for showing the invulnerability of Twinkies, 1/2 for the references to old sci fi films, and -1/2 for getting show tunes stuck in my head.

1 comment:

Patrick Roberts said...

Wall-E totally looks like the robot from "Short Circuit," minus the cheesy 80's style of course... but i'm sure Pixar made a totally original story otherwise